teeth and a request

I can honestly call myself a procrastinator. I will wait until I have no dishes before I would wash any. I will have nothing but a can of coconut milk in the cabinet before I go shopping. I will stay awake until my head is about to fall off before I sleep. And I will let me teeth go until the pain is so bad that I'm crying.

I have fillings that went bad a few years back and probably new cavities as well. I really don't mind going to the dentist. I mean, yeah, I hate going and getting shots. I hate the gooey stuff they put on your teeth to clean them. I hate the whiring noise. And the numb mouth up to my ear that lasts all day. But I would still be willing to go. Along with procrastinating, I also find it hard to get money to go. I know it would cost at least $800. And when we save money, it's usually for a reason. Sometimes for stupid reasons, like going to Disney World. Or for responsible reasons like paying taxes or to fix our sewer.

I can ignore the pain of the cavities by avoiding cold or sweet things that could stick to my teeth, like chocolate candy or caramel. And the pain can be excrutiating. It would usually last for a minute, slowly fading.

I have been working on making my faith alive. You know, walk the walk, not just talk the talk. What's the point in knowing God CAN help you, if you don't believe that He WILL help you? Is your faith that He will heal you or is it that He won't? If you think He won't, then your faith is what fails you, not God.

So, the other day we went to rent a movie and there were people selling Girl Scout cookies. We very rarely get them. I haven't had them in probably 4 years or more. I know Tony likes Thin Mints, as do we all, and I wanted Caramel Delites. We got one of each.

Now, I had just been complaining to Tony about how my teeth hurt so bad when I eat chocolate or caramel and that I have prayed about it. So I will be eating something and not even think about it and start eating on the right side of my mouth, where it hurts. And then I feel that familiar pain coming on. And I say to God "Now why is it that I pray for you to fix my teeth and yet I still have pain? I wasn't avoiding eating on that side of my mouth, Father. Sometimes I avoid it, but I'm trying to have faith and I ate on that side, so shouldn't it not have hurt?" And I continue to pray, first for the pain to go away, then for more faith.

After we bought the cookies, we went home with our movie and watched it. I opened the Caramel Delites and had one. This time, though, I remembered that my teeth normally hurt on the one side and I made it a point to chew on that side that it hurts on. I figure if I'm really going to put faith in God, then I need to act on that faith. I had to believe that I was healed and that since I'm healed, it will NOT hurt for me to eat sweet stuff. And so I ate it. And it didn't hurt. Later I had another. No pian. The next day, the same thing. I thank God.

God can give and He can take. As long as my faith is pure, I believe my teeth will remain well. If I begin doubting again, it will come back.

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And now a request.

My mom has been trying to renew her loan for months now. Well, she's been trying to figure out which portion is hers, and which is mine. That has proven impossible. Finally she got the paperwork filled out and they took them in today. I'm thinking, thank goodness, because I want to quit paying nearly $200 extra a month on this ARM loan that has expired. So we're paying all this extra interest. Then she drops the bomb. She talked with the loan person about my situation with the loan and he said it should be no problem for us to get a loan and that my mom should email me the information tonight and tomorrow I can just run it up there and get it processed with hers. Then she also tells me that it would be a 5 year ARM. I tell her that I don't want to get an ARM, because I see how much of a hassle it has been, and if the economy begins to collapse, I don't want my house to get taken from me. And it will happen whether we have a regular loan or an ARM loan, really. I don't want a loan at all. Then she says "well, if you want a fixed rate loan, it will take two months to process it. " She says that as if I care. She has burdened me with her loan that she has put off refinancing. Because of it, it has cost me thousands of dollars in interest. And now she wants me to screw up my loan by getting an ARM loan , just so she can get her loan processed now, instead of in two months.

So I called Tony and he is seeing about loans from someone. And I'm praying for a solution. Whether it be our own loan, my parents keeping us on theirs, or even $30,000 to fall from the sky.

I'm asking you to please pray that God will help us with this and help us to have faith and patience. Not fear and anxiety. Fear and anxiety are anti-God. They come from satan, not God. I don't want or need that. Also, I find that when I stop worrying, miracles happen.

Thank you.